February 16, 2008

This Was the Week That Was - February 16, 2008

What a week, what a week! Plenty of entertainment in politics and even some consequences. Let’s start off with the week’s Democratic primaries and caucuses, otherwise known as the Obama. “The Obama what?” There is not a what, just the Obama. His campaign has been a study of consistency and a great example of timing. His message has been simple, inspirational, and positive. His offense doesn’t seem like one and when he attacks, it comes off as defensive. As a result, his tone is remarkably consistent. And, now that his message and tenor are established, he is adding policy to the inspiration, at least in his speeches. The policy has been there all along, in his books and on his web site, you just have to read it. Whether he wins or loses this contest, Obama’s campaign will be studied for years to come.

By contrast is Hillary Clinton’s “strategy,” which is as muddled as her presentation and her message. She’s been hard, she’s been soft. She is an outsider that is going to stir things up, she has been in Washington and politics all her life and has the experience to “get things done.” Bill Clinton is a big part of her past, Bill Clinton just happens to be her husband. Etc., etc. Some might accuse her of “flip flop,” but her problem isn’t changing positions on issues. Her one consistent identity is that of a woman ( and she should thank Science that genetics has fixed her gender, otherwise she’d muddle that up!). She’s become the Democrat’s version of Mitt Romney. Given that she came into the race with 100% backing of the Democratic establishment, more money than anyone imagined possible, and a fearful political machine, the nomination should be hers. That she’s squandered these advantages shows how shitty a campaigner she is (and, perhaps, how ineffective a president she would be).

While I am not going to bury Clinton, I’ll predict that you have seen the end of the Democratic Leadership Council-era Democratic Party. Even if Obama gets beat out of the nomination or gets the nomination and loses the general election, the party is his. He has brought too many people into it, inspired too many people who had given up, and has articulated a future, not only for the party but for the country. The DLC has delivered nothing new, nothing the voters want to hear, and if their standard barer was a man rather than a woman, Obama would be the Dems’ choice for November.

Likewise, the Republican Party that emerges from this race is going to be different. The two people remaining in the race are not party people. Huckabee might be a born again Christer and a social reactionary, but the free market crowd consider him to be a socialist. McCain is hated by many within his own party. He doesn’t buck to party pressure. While he has pandered to different conservative interest groups – he is a politician, ya know – his votes are his. That many Democrats could “live with” McCain as president, bugs the shit out of the Win at All Costs Repugs. But they are stuck with McCain as he is the only Republican out there that can win in November. And, with Obama bringing so many people into the voting booth, the Rove strategy of suppressing the vote and turning out the base is a loser. Consider this: McCain is a moderate, who is now being framed as a conservative. If people come to believe McCain is conservative, will the Republican Party be forced to shift to the center?

One thing that doesn’t help Republicans is the idiots they have in office. Did I just write “idiots”? Sorry, I meant “fucking idiots.” How else can you explain bozos like Indiana Congressman Dan Burton? I don’t know if you watched any of the Congressional Steroids Hearing. It was another one of those Congressional Grandstanding Sessions: An issue comes in front of a committee. TV crews are there. Congressmembers each choose a “hero” to praise and a “villain” to attack, the choice dictated by party affiliation. Guests are asked a few questions then lauded or ground down. And the grandstanding goes on until the cameras leave.

While the Democrats are as bad on the attack as Republicans, no one can suck cock like a conservative. It doesn’t matter if the adorned is a Supreme Court nominee, an Iraq War general, the Attorney General, or a ‘roided up asshole of a baseball player, once deemed “hero,” each and every conservative elected official takes hero’s cock in mouth, with smile on face. And I am not talking nips and nibbles; Repugs are total deep throaters. And like Linda Lovelace’s cinematic contribution, there is nothing subtle about it.

Most of the time, these obscenities are viewed only by the pervs who tune into C-SPAN. However, when an athlete or entertainer is before Congress, the spectacle might as well be Pam & Tommy or Paris Hilton. Even the most prudish wants a peek. And thus, millions of sports fans tuned to C-SPAN and watched the Roid Fiasco - and when they did, they caught cock suckers like Dan Burton in full throat. Tsk tsk. Not a good thing for the Republican Party, especially when the lead Democratic candidate is talking about ending partisanship and “bringing the country together.” It also doesn’t help that this same candidate is a self-professed sports freak and advertised during the Super Bowl. And when the Repugs’ cockmaster is the idiot brute Roger Clemens, HA! Clemens might be the only person in baseball who makes Barry Bonds look good! I think the Republican Era is over.

Also not of much help for the Republicans are the tornados that hit the upper South and Midwest. Disasters happen, but damn the Republicans when they occur on President Bush’s watch. Doesn’t matter how fast the government reacts, if they give each victim a check for a cool million, or if the President offers to put up the storm refugees in Crawford, any Act of God that occurs will happen in front of a backdrop of Katrina. That being the case, you’d think that Bush would push the state to act fast, cut a check for a million per, and open his ranch up to the people. Instead the Compassionate Conservative tells the victims that he is there to help but, more importantly, that the country is praying for the victims. Praying for the victims? Ha! What a fucking creep.

Yeah, despite what happens in November, I think this sad chapter in American history is about to close.

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